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House of Lies

Dear Heart,

I love you.  I’ve loved you from the moment you cried with me over the loss of my child.  A child that didn’t even belong to you.  You seduced me with your charm.  I fell….HARD!!!!

For the next 14 years, I lived a lie.  I learned to hide my situation from outsiders.  The only problem is, I loved a LIE!  The man you pretended to be never existed.  I saw who you were too late.  It was almost so late that you nearly killed me.

How can a person be so evil?  I had to find the reasons.  I’ve read books…….lots of books.  I’ve discovered the truth.

Hindsight is 20/20.  Oh, if only I had seen the signs.  If only I was smarter.  If only…….

However, despite it all, I am grateful that I have my son.  He is the only good thing to come from all these lies.  He is my shining star.  He makes the pain and heartache worth it.

How did I get here?  By believing an older man who lied, tricked and deceived so many to perpetuate a house of cards.  Too bad the blinders were ripped off and the house fell down.  You hurt so many people and still do.  I’m just glad to have escaped it.

I can only imagine the number of women you have deceived, slept with, hurt.  I can only imagine the abandonment, hurt and heartache that your children feel about you.  I can only imagine how differently my life could have been had I never met you.

You are a psychopath.  You have no consceince You use whatever you can to get what you want.  You do whatever makes you happy; but never cared about who you hurt in the process.

You cheated, then blamed me.

I needed you, you were never there.

You beat me, tried to break my neck, lied about it and you didn’t care.

YOU BLAMED ME for YOUR actions.

You attacked children, treating them as your equals and made fun of them for crying.  You then denied you did anything wrong.  Have you EVER admitted your fault?

So many times, I was foolish enough to let bad situations go with a mere apology.  I am a fool.

The blinders were ripped off my eyes 3 1/2 years ago.  I AM FREE!  I am out of your reach.  I am a victim no more.

My son and I went to therapy.  We learned so much about how we were no responsible for what you had done to us.  YOU were the bad guy, not us.  You were the one who hurt us.  You were the one who lied and deceived.  We are now new people, who have become stronger than who we were under your control.

For us, you were a lie that never existed.  We have each other, you have no one; but yourself.  We are far richer than you will ever be or know.


About irishgoddess1337

Retired Marine, Christian who survived Domestic Violence, living with Lupus, PTSD, Fibromyalgia, Migraine, TMJ, Trigeminal Neuralgia, Sleep Apnea and living my life for Jesus! My son is a Senior this year!! YIKES! I love music! My son plays drums in his High School Marching Band & Percussion group. We live with three fur babies -- Tippy the Corgi and Honi & Teddy the Poms. I scrapbook, stamp and make rag dolls for fun! I've recently started acrylic painting and making jewelry. Life is good!

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