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My Life is Out of Control!

It has come to my attention that I am nothing but a fat whore. Someone who professes to love me has told me that I am nothing but a nasty bitch, fat whore, cunt and piece of shit. I am nothing. My lineage, my life, everything I am is a waste of life and that I am useless to everyone and everything. I guess I have been fooling myself for far too long.

I have worked my ass off for this person. I have treated this person better than I treat myself. I am practically a slave to this person and yet, this ungrateful smuck has the nerve to tell me I am the worthless one; because I told him to get off his ass and get his own clothes to wear. I’m so over this shit. I’m tire of having to defend myself to this piece of dung.

I’m nothing but a pig.

I’m having none of this shit. He has pissed on my pillow, thrown water on me, destroyed my property, treated me like utter shit; but I am the one who is in the wrong. This drunken bastard treats me like crap and I am the problem.

He has serious medical issues and they are more important than my medical issues. I’m not “allowed” to be the disabled veteran I am. I am not allowed to be sick. I have to cater to his every need and if I am not able to do so because I am not feeling well, then there is hell to pay.

I am not allowed to buy myself things that interfere with his “beer money”. If he doesn’t have beer money, I have to find things to sell so he can get some. It is ridiculous. I’m a prisoner of a life I despise. He treats me and my son like garbage. I’m so over this bull shit. He needs help.

Why do I attract these losers? I don’t deserve this in my life. I’d rather be alone than with a person who treats me this badly. This jerk thinks that screaming at me and chastising me for an hour without interruption, degrading my character is a great way to spend the evening.  Like he’s some prince.  He told me tonight that the reason his dick is limp is because of me and how fat I am.  Could be that he’s 350 lbs, diabetic (which is out of control) and can’t even heal from the cold he’s had since April, that is causing the problem; but what do I know.  Oh and the fact that he hardly ever bathes is just disgusting and I can barely stomach his sweat soaked, stench laden ass.

I’ve come to the point where I just don’t say anything to him when he rants on and on.  I ignore him.  I can’t let his words hurt me.  I’m better than this.  He blames me for everything.  He needs to go.  It’s not working and I would rather live alone than with this man or any other man.

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About irishgoddess1337

SAHM, Retired Marine, Christian who survived Domestic Violence, living with Lupus, Fibromyalgia, Migraine, TMJ, Trigeminal Neuralgia, Sleep Apnea and living my life for Jesus! My son is a teen! YIKES! I love music! My son plays drums in his High School Marching Band & Percussion group. We live with three fur babies -- Tippy the Corgi and Honi & Teddy the Poms. I scrapbook, stamp and make rag dolls for fun! I've recently started acrylic painting and making jewelry. Life is good!

One response to “My Life is Out of Control!

  1. betternotbroken ⋅

    Sometimes, it gets to the point where there is nothing left to say. I wish you all the best and I nominated you for an award. http://betternotbroken.com/2015/06/14/thank-you-miriam-another-liebster-nomination/

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