Upon reflection during this holiday season, I know the Lord has a plan for my life. Like the legendary Phoenix, I have risen out of the ashes after facing death 7 times. I am stronger today than the first time I nearly died and I will continue to become stronger each day. Pain is my daily life; but even the “suicide disease” can’t defeat me. I am a survivor!!!
Not a day goes by that I don’t push my pain aside to live my life. I am a mother, raising a son alone. It is my job, each day, to ensure he grows up to be the best possible man he can be. It is not an easy task. Most days I feel like an utter failure. However, I rise up again the next day to start over. I am the only one my son has, so I have to try again each day.
Living with several diseases is hard. It is hard on him when I have to tell him I can’t do something, even though I so desperately want to let him. It is hard to play mother and father to a child. Money gets tight when bills have to be paid
Each day brings with it it’s own struggles. Is my Trigeminal Neuralgia going to bring me low with it’s pain? Is my Lupus going to flare and cause me to rebel against my body? Is the Fibromyalgia going to cause me so much burning or pain that I can’t even wear clothes? I can’t plan the day until I wake for fear of disappointing myself and my son.
My doctors can’t help me; but I do know that I am stronger than most women and I will get through each day as it is presented to me.
So, another year has gone by and I’m still kicking my way along the path the Lord has set me on. Merry Christmas to you all.