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Hospice Continues

As I write this, it’s been over a week since we started Hope Hospice. He has a great Nurse, CNA & Social Worker. The CNA comes 3x’s a day. The Nurse every Friday and the Social Worker every other Friday.

Since Friday, 5/27/16, he hasn’t been eating a lot of food. He’s down to only a few bites here and there. Saturday seemed to be a turning point for that. I believe he has a UTI since he was screaming in pain during urination since Thursday evening. I got him some AZO at Walgreens for him and so far, it seems to be helping a bit.

He’s stopped having any BM’s since last week and he is in and out of lucidity. His urine output is about 800 ml daily now. He’s definitely drinking more than he’s out putting. I’ve read the data on End Stage Liver disease and it is not pretty. I hate seeing him in such pain.

He is sleeping more and more since the weekend and his dream state is very active. He’s continuing to see people and objects that are not there.

His Social Security has been approved; but at this point it is useless. He’ll be dead before the first payment is received, so he won’t even get a payment. It is a shame. They decided that his PTSD, which the VA didn’t help him with or even properly document, which has been giving him problems since 2012 was not problematic. They decided he didn’t become disabled until this past December 2015, even though he had two suicide attempts.

The first suicide attempt he was hospitalized at Bay Pines VA for a week. The second time, four months later, he went to the ICU at CCH and then Baker Acted at Bay Pines for a week. It’s been so hard for him. My heart is breaking over the way this man has been treated. He had a mental health doctor tell him he needed to “grow a pair” and “be a man”, degrading him further and sending him into an even deeper depression. His VA Social Worker didn’t work on anything meaningful or try to help him in any way and only saw him once a month.

This horrible treatment had him resistant to see them and made his mental health plummet. He then had a Primary Care doctor who I blame for his complete medical downfall. She was a bitch and had her own agenda. She was finally let go and by that time, it was too late.

I began just taking him to CCH ER for treatment since his doctors at the VA were useless and didn’t listen or make any referrals to other doctors. Or, when they did make referrals, they came two – three months’ after the referral was made.

Let me tell you about Veteran’s Choice. Veteran’s Choice is the new measure with which the VA allows vets to see outside providers when a vet can’t get into see a doctor more than 40 days out. Sounds great; however, when we requested this, it took over 4 months for approval. We should’ve just waited and saw the VA doctors. Either way, he’s now on his way to leaving this world.

Hospice isn’t easy. I’m working my butt off for him; but since I’m the first person to do so, it is a pleasure and honor. He’s getting weaker and weaker. He’s having a hard time staying steady with his hands. He can hardly hold a cup and has had a lot of near spills and spills, much to his frustration.

I pray for him every day and ask for God to be merciful. I don’t like watching him suffer. All I can say is I’m glad he is home and not hooked up to tubes and crap at the hospital. May God have mercy on his soul.

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About irishgoddess1337

SAHM, Retired Marine, Christian who survived Domestic Violence, living with Lupus, Fibromyalgia, Migraine, TMJ, Trigeminal Neuralgia, Sleep Apnea and living my life for Jesus! My son is a teen! YIKES! I love music! My son plays drums in his High School Marching Band & Percussion group. We live with three fur babies -- Tippy the Corgi and Honi & Teddy the Poms. I scrapbook, stamp and make rag dolls for fun! I've recently started acrylic painting and making jewelry. Life is good!

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